Wednesday, January 25, 2012

So Inspired

These past two years or so I've been amazed at the inspiration I've been blessed with from my new world of discovering other artists and bloggers who have published books or websites.  It constantly blows my mind the amount of beauty and positivity I have been lucky enough to have found at a low time in my life.  Let me give a little bit of background.

About two and a half years ago, I was out of work on disability trying to heal and get better so I could start chemotherapy for my kidneys (had lupus nephritis).  I couldn't start the chemo because I had consistent bronchitis and working in a middle school with germs wasn't helping, so my doctor thought it would be best to take some time off.  Well, at first I bawled.  Oh my God--this was serious.  If this chemo didn't work, I'd need dialysis.  If that didn't work, I'd need a kidney transplant.  Not to mention, I might lose my hair and who knows what else (I know in the grand scheme of things the hair loss is nothing).  I also was freaked out that people at work, my husband and my in-laws wouldn't understand why I couldn't work during this time.  I only was having chemo once a month.  Daily I had to tell myself I was doing what was best and was needed for me.

After I got over the initial freak-out, I actually felt so free.  So happy.  Which was so weird, because I was so sick.  That started to tell me something.  Maybe teaching wasn't where I was meant to be.  Maybe teaching added to my illness.  Well during that time, I found the book Taking Flight by Kelly Rae Roberts.  You could say this is what started it all.  Yes, I've always wanted to paint, but this gave me the push I needed to jump in.  I read about her whispers and listening to them.  I knew I had whispers too.  Long silenced whispers.  But having all this time off gave me lots of time to start really hearing these whispers.  I found myself painting at 3 in the morning because my medicine gave me a hard time sleeping, but I was so excited, even though I would normally be so mad that I wasn't sleeping when I should have been.  It didn't matter because I knew I could take a nap later and I was also full of joy and hope.  As I spent months away from teaching I read more from other inspirational souls like Christine Mason Miller and Patti Digh to name a few.  Knowing my health was serious, I also started realizing that I needed to take my happiness into my own hands as well.  I started taking little steps by opening an etsy shop after e-mailing Kelly Rae Roberts and her suggesting as much.  I started applying to art shows.  I got accepted to some.  People told me that my work was joyful and happy.  I told them it made me feel joyful and happy creating it.  That was just the start.  Brave Girls came into my life as well.  In addition to creating, I started realizing that I was important and that my dreams mattered, no matter what.


I could probably write much more about my journey to where I am now, but I just wanted to share a few bits and pieces.  I want to just say thank you to those amazing women who gave me the courage to jump into a new chapter of my life.  Though I still have lupus, my kidneys are in remission.  Though my salary is much less as a library aide than a teacher, I'm so damn happy.  Thank you to all of you.  All of you who are inspiring and encouraging me everyday.  Not just the well-known artists and authors, but all of the women I've met on-line who are helping me fly as well as my friends Carrie and Jenny.  I'm so blessed.  Thank you thank you thank you.

29 comments:

  1. I loved reading this post, Jill! Thank you so much for sharing a little of your journey - you ARE a very brave girl. I am excited for what is in store for you and inspired by the way you took a situation that many would have used as an excuse to give up and are turning it into something that is such a blessing to others. You are a great example of what can happen when we choose to believe in ourselves, our dreams and step out in faith! xo

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  2. Thank you for visiting, Kathleen. I wouldn't be where I am at without the support of you and the rest of the Fly Girls.

    Jill

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  3. I am so awestruck and inspired by you, your post, and the journey you walk and talk so authentically every day on our Fly Group. Blessings to you...

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    1. Thank you so much for reading my story--it means a lot to be able to share it with you.

      Jill

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  4. Wow, Jill! I had no idea! I am so glad you are better and that I get to watch as your Art evolves! It is so pretty and very happy! And now knowing the story behind it, makes it even more amazing!

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    1. Thanks, Ursula. It's great to share this flight with you.

      Jill

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  5. Beautiful and heartfelt Jill. I really enjoyed reading your post today :)

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    1. I'm glad you stopped by today. I'm glad you are with me on this journey.

      Jill

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  6. Thanks for sharing this, Jill. I had picked up bits and pieces over the months, but it was nice to see it all at once! Glad to have you as a "tribe mate!"

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    1. I'm so glad too--you have been making this journey so much more fun:)

      Jill

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  7. Your story resonates, it is so close to my own, teaching, illness, art, rest, recovery, renewal. I hope you continue to heal & find your own flight path!

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    1. Thanks, Lindsey it's nice to find another person who can relate. It's nice to be on this journey with you. I'm glad you stopped by.

      Jill

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  8. Thank you for sharing your story, Jill. You are amazing and strong. Wow! So thankful you are healthy and well. Keep listening to those whispers. Look at you go!

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    1. I am starting to see myself as strong finally, never did before. I feel very uplifted by my new creative community.

      Jill

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  9. So nice to read more about you! What a great story - And now you are inspiring all of us other flyers, too. :)

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  10. I'm so glad you posted a link to this post on the Business Soul Session Facebook group. Thank you so much for sharing your story. I can't wait to check out your blog.

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    1. It's so exciting being part of a new group working on this new way of creating a business. I'm glad you stopped by--thank you!

      Jill

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  11. Beautiful post Jill. Even though I was lucky enough to get to know you in person, I hope you know I enjoy having you as a fly sister:)

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  12. You are such a sweetheart~ Your story says so much about your healing and growth, you definitely have come through with a strong voice & mighty spirit! I think illness has a very deliberate effect on life, I too had a terrible couple of years that tore through my identity and my freedom. I came out of that struggle with a HUGE will to LIVE & LOVE BIG. It was one of the most pivotal experiences in my life.

    Thank you for sharing and helping others (me) be more willing to share and heal in a positive way. You are a blessing~
    xo

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    1. Thanks for sharing your similarity with the effects of illness on us--good and bad. I agree they really can change your life and end up being even better in the end.

      Jill

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  13. Beautiful post Jill! I am so glad you shared!!! It has been great getting to know you on line. Your art truly reflects the strength you have gained through your challenges!!

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    1. Thank you Mary. I am starting to see that too--that my art is reflecting my growing strength.

      Jill

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  14. Such a beautiful and sincere post Jill. Your true authentic voice is in every word. Love you and your spirit, and so darn proud to call you friend.

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  15. Great story and post. Honest and so brave. Your story inspires.

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  16. It feels so great to share this story--I felt different even writing it compared to other posts--maybe it is the most authentic one I've done. My heart just swells with joy at all of you stopping by and "chatting."

    Jill

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  17. This is a wonderful story as you connected with your true self. Brave lady.

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  18. Jill - such an authentic beautifully written post. Much love you to and so happy you are a part of my life. ((((hugs)))

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  19. What an awesome post. I had no idea all the stuff you went through. I'm so happy that you found your art. It makes us all happy.

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    1. I'm glad it makes you all happy--that is my ultimate hope:)

      Jill

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