Some of you who know me are aware that I have lupus and have been living with this illness for 13 years. I've been through chemotherapy to help kidney disease which is now in remission (yay!). Early menopause from the chemo unfortunately took away my chance of having a second child a few years ago. I've had to quit my full-time teaching job as well, something I worked really hard on in college and in my graduate program. Often I'm in lots of pain and moving my hands, neck, feet, legs, etc. can be really really hard some days. I cannot handle being in the sun or heat. Let's just say, my life has changed drastically. Sometimes I give into a personal pity-party - it's hard not to some days. But through all this I am learning that I am a strong person. And, yes, I occasionally have to remind myself of that in my art journal. An affirmation, a reminder that I can handle this. I'm surviving everyday, sometimes even thriving I guess. Though I wish I were cured, I still do feel so much joy about life and the gifts I have been given. This is the only way for me to deal with struggles daily.
I'm hoping that even though you too may have some major or even minor obstacles or stressors, that you know you really are strong and can handle them. Sometimes I have to remind myself to breathe, maybe walk away, even whisper gently to myself "it's okay" and these things help put me back in a strong, capable and hopefully calm frame of mind.
When you are struggling and think you just can't handle one more thing, what do you do to help yourself? Are you good at reminding yourself how strong you are? Think of all the challenges you have faced in your life - you are strong.
I just found your blog. As I was reading and came upon this blog post...tears came to my eyes. We are strong! I, too, have lupus...30 diagnosed yrs for me. I'm 56 yrs old. I, too, had to have chemo...81/2 yrs of it, for another immune disease...cryoglobulinemia, which is now basically "calm". Pain is an everyday issue. I totally relate. Art has been my coping factor for years. Pen and ink with watercolor. No blog...just enjoying life and art, and trying to live positive. I love the bright colors in your journals. I find I am drawn to the bright colors, too. Keep strong!...keep striving to live happy. I find I do the best when I don't let lupus take the smile away from my heart. Not always easy, and I, too, don't always make an A-plus...but it's my goal. Best wishes! I'll be back!
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad you left me a message and I'm so glad you connected with my story! It's great to meet you and I love hearing that art helps you as well.
DeleteJill